Overland and Borders

Morning everyone, 7.30 wake up this morning, well then Craig’s awake everyone’s awake in our house (standing joke! It used to be me…) I could sleep for Scotland now. My head is saying get up and go for a walk and get the steps over and done with, my body’s saying take it easy, it’s ok to need to rest…. guess which one is winning so far?!? So, homemade banana bread for breakfast, be rude not to…. come to think of it, Craig had toast… yeah just rude 🤭🤣

The goodSAM app sent through an update this morning saying that they’ve now created a website for us with all the information that we need and they constantly update the fact sheets which are the guidelines we need to work through. There’s a FB page for members too and it seems the call outs are slowly starting to pick up in some areas. I’ve been volunteering now for 197 hours but not been alerted to a call yet. They need to increase referrals to the system to allow the volunteer opportunities to flow. They don’t want us to wear any kind of uniform do that people can’t fraudulently copy it. We’ve got free parking passes for when we are out on a call. Sitting here printing it all out so we have all the answers when it all kicks in. Now I’m on the hunt for a ring binder to keep it all in??!? Dammit lol

Just had a call from the mortgage company re a 3 month mortgage break, lovely guy and lovely to speak to someone different. While we can afford to pay straight through I want to take the break as Craig isn’t earning and I’m now redundant so it just buys me a wee bit more time at the other end. He said that we can pay it back after if we want to which I’ll near in mind. I don’t want to add to debt through this but don’t want to give it all away either so I’m forced to find work straight away.

Today’s big task is to start on the back of the house. It’s needs pressure washed, to dry out and then be repainted!

Just announced another 761 deaths in UK hospitals but the oldest survivor so far is a woman of 106! That’s amazing. The daily death figures do not include those who are dying in care homes which means the numbers will be much higher. Someone contacted me from the Beith Trust about volunteering as I’d commented on a FB post they did so I filled out an application form to volunteer for them. Wait and see what comes back first.

There’s a 99 year old WW2 veteran that’s been raising money for the NHS by waking round his garden. Last I heard he’d raised £7m but everytime I saw a new total it had gone up by £2milion!! Amazing amount of money to raise!! This will make you laugh… no joke, I just looked it up and the total is now £9 million…. but the time you read this assume £11mill. He says he will keep on walking until he stops getting the donations!

All the activity finally caught up with me and I ended up having a 2 hour nap this afternoon. I feel fatigued, like really zonked so did nothing all evening except veg in front of the tv. We’re watching ZeroZeroZero on Amazon Prime which is about the cocaine industry. I know it’s ok to rest if I have to but still sometimes struggle when my head thinks there’s loads to be done…..

Woke up a 7.20 and saw the sun and thought magic, walk, steps, get going, tired… then Craig said, I’ll walk the dogs 😬 oh ok then not counting mega steps today, see how quickly I changed my mind. I’m feeling a lot brighter today though, less sluggish which is great. So I decided to back Healthy Banana bread by Cookie and Kate, an online recipe!

While that’s cooking I saw a message on the Gateside Inn messenger asking if they could hire the hall. I’ve just been added as an admin for the Gateside Inn FB page so I replied back and said I’d let her know as the hall is closed just now. She was desperate for her daughter to film something for her dance school exam and they had been trying to squeeze it into their house but couldn’t do it. When we agreed to let them use the lady said thank you so much I could cry! They are making her daughter do some fairly difficult stuff for her exams even though she can’t physically be at college. So they are over their now, filming what they need and it feels like the Gateside good deed for the day! We keep saying these are strange times. It’s nice to be nice!

Next thing to tackle is the “junk cupboard” most folk have a drawer, we have that drawer AND a cupboard. Not any more, it’s so clean you could eat your dinner out of it. All sorts of stuff put back in the right place and not just the dumping ground! Quick up the ladder over the fence coffee with Claire next door which was lovely. Damn chilly wind though!!

Next stop the bathroom… we used to have a great cleaner who came in every Friday but can’t justify that luxury anymore. Was hard enough to justify when I was off work sick but definitely not now I’m unemployed…. after I told her we’d have to stop I was great and did a real “Mary clean” once a week for about 3 weeks…. then not so much. In a house with 3 dogs you learn to stop looking at the mess. When I was single there wasn’t a speck of dust in my flat!! Now?? Yep pretty much everywhere 🤣🤣🤣 so the bathroom is now so clean you could eat your dinner off……. yeah no… not that clean but sparkling instead of that dull soapy hue!! It looks bloody good!! So it’s 2pm and I’ve sat down for a weeeeeee rest to type this so far!

Coronavirus wise there are another 778 deaths in the UK. One in five deaths in the UK now are from infected patients. Many are dying in care homes now. Many nurses and front line care workers are catching it due to lack of personal protection equipment (PPE) there’s a shortage of this just now. I’m still not being asked to do and NHS volunteering yet but thankfully my neighbour got me some disposable gloves just in case. So the only thing I can do just now is to crochet the hearts that hospitals are requesting for people separated from their loved ones who are in hospital.

Off to watch a movie that doesn’t involve a pandemic!! Thanks to all of you who get this far, it means a lot ❤️❤️

It was such a lovely morning but freezing cold and I just wasn’t feeling the 15k steps today so decided to take the dogs up to the old golf course with the frisbees, less steps for me but they will be knackered after it!

Home for garlic mushrooms on toast and read a bit more about the NHS responder app. They are still working on the network of doctors and pharmacies etc to make them aware of the resource they have in the area. We shouldn’t panic we are not getting used yet. I messaged the Beith and district council fb post where they showed all the stuff they are doing to help the local area, asked if there was anything I could do to help until the NHS one kicks in properly. The dogs were pretty zonked all day! w

So I decided to start crocheting the wee red hearts that hospitals have been asking for. I think they want them in sets of two and one will stay with the patient in hospital and one with the family since they can’t visit their loved ones in hospital. I’ve done about 10 wee ones and 4 big ones. Pics to follow when they’re done.

It was a lovely calm afternoon, cold in the breeze and shade but managed to get burnt to a crisp while I crocheted… not like me eh???! 🤷🏻‍♀️🤭😆 there was a background pressure washer most of the day as Kenny next door was finishing the beer garden then he went round the front and did the front of the pub so poor Craigie had to go on do the front of our house… the amount of funk and dust that builds up over the winter is unreal. Craig will be desperate to get back to work……. it’s easier than working through the list of things to be done!

Cold shower to soothe the sunburn and pasta bolognese for dinner and trifle and Lindt bunny…. stop eating for gods sake!!

There was such a calm and stillness once the pressure washer was finally done and you could be forgiven for thinking it was just a lovely quiet day. Forgetting that there are fewer cars as we’re not allowed to leave the house except for essential reasons. You could be forgiven for forgetting the suffering that’s going on in the world… another 717 people died in UK hospitals. Boris Johnson is recovering at Chequers after getting out of hospital. I hope he changes his policies on the NHS now and stops trying to sell it off as we would be in horrific shape without it right now. He said that he can tell it is driven by love. Very strong and wise words. These key workers deserve higher salaries for the work that they do and the care that they give. Got sad news today that Covid-19 is now in my uncles mums care home. Jeannie is the coolest old person I know. She makes me laugh everytime I see her. She’s a special one and is in lockdown in her room until this is over. Thinking of her with lots of love 💜💜💜

I wouldn’t have a clue what day it was if I wasn’t writing this… 20 days of staying at home and only being allowed out to the shops for essentials seems so normal now. I am exhausted today. Can’t open my eyes but Craig decides on at 8am Tesco visit so the dogs are bounding all over me. Really have no choice but to get it. I’m actually swallowing myself yawning this morning so stuff the steps today. Sometimes I need to remember that it’s only been a few weeks since I started to feel a bit better and the meds I’m on for anxiety and depression still have a huge kick in them at a certain level. I was almost comatose at 100mg and now I’m on 75mg so some days my body just says “nut it’s no happening” today was one of those days.

So first things first after Craig gets home from Tesco is getting the wee fairy door fitted to next doors tree for the girls.

We set out a wee Easter Egg hunt for them as well and then head back for breakfast! Maple and pecan pastries today fresh from the shop. The last thing I said before he left was to try and buy fresh and healthy stuff! My willpower’s oot the windae!!

After that I’m not kidding, I sat about till about 2pm doing precious little, not great for a blog eh?

Had a lovely FaceTime call with mum and dad. Brought them up to speed on all the stuff we’ve been doing but mum must be reading this as she picked up on the state of the upstairs bedroom from the other day. No flies on her eh?! So spent the afternoon having a socially distanced chat with neighbours in the back gardens. The sun shone and tomorrow’s looking good too. Here’s hoping I have a bit more energy but I know that if I don’t that’s ok too.

So still no call to help the NHS so a lazy morning with a wee chat with my neighbour Michelle about different dog walking routes as we’re getting bored with the same ones. Lovely to have a wee gab… then out with Calaidh and Freya as Craig walks Bhruic. It started off freezing and by the end of the walk the sun was out and there was a real warmth! I stayed on the roads but managed to let the dogs run round 3 fields.

I’d spoken to Craig earlier in the week about making a fairy door for the girls that live next door to surprise them with as Easter. By the time I got back he was working on it like a man possessed! It’s amazing!!!!

Reckon he could have a career sideline???!? I checked everything in the greenhouse and it’s all doing dine so decided to clean the big shed windows. Found that they are all loose and detached from their frame so found some black sealant and went to work. Oh my actual god….. what a goddam awful mess I made! Didn’t have the strength to get it out the tube properly so starting using my hands!

So soap and hot water DO NOT wash this stuff off. Only made my hands stick together more. Shouting across the fence at neighbours got the WD-40 response and wow…. it worked the stuff off but still needed a rough cloth to get the residue off. Who knew WD-40 would leave your hands feeling so clean and soft??!?! 🤷🏻‍♀️😳

Planted Summer flowering bulbs in the garden, will see if they come to anything. By this time it’s starting to feel pretty warm so I sat down and crocheted in the garden. Various folk who saw me over the fence said I looked like a 92 year old woman but hey I was loving it! Making a 2 bobble hat but it’s not going according to plan as it’s far too big!!!!

At 6.30 we logged into another Overland Bound campfire call and it was great to see some new faces. The usual banter and wise cracks!!

So as far as coronavirus goes the UK had a total of 980 deaths yesterday which is higher than both Italy or Spain’s daily total which is not good. Apparently Boris Johnson is now able to walk around slowly so continuing to recover. It was 917 today…. people are being fined for ignoring lockdown rules and making unnecessary journeys. Very strange times.

Up and at the steps today first thing with all 3 dogs at once. Of course we met horses and bikes and cars and people. Hardly seen anyone on my walks before today but it’s Good Friday so guess many folk who are working from home as off today?

By the time I got back Craig was out in the big shed putting up insulation and pallet wood walls. The insulation is the stuff that comes with our frozen dog food and the pallets are lying around. We’re trying to do as much as we can with stuff we have to use it up and stop it going to waste.

I spent the day back at the fruit patch tidying it all up

Craig’s still banging away in the shed and it stayed dry to I started on the decking stain. I had the shakes as I was so exhausted but wanted to keep going before it rains over the next few days. I did read that the weather forecasts wouldn’t be as accurate just now as there are so few planes flying. The planes apparently collect data on weather fronts… the forecasts do seem to be a bit worse than usual…

Ok enough’s enough, we’re both knackered and walking like we’re in our early 80’s!! I had the best shower. I checked the GoodSam app to make sure it’s still working… it is. The fb page for GoodSam tells you that it’s ok if you’re not called it just means there’s no jobs in the area yet but there must be something we could be doing? Don’t get me wrong we’re getting loads done but I’ve signed up to help the NHS and there doesn’t seem to be anything to do yet. Anyway I’m not complaining. Today’s news is another 800+ deaths, yesterday’s was way over 800 too. I’d read 750 but Sky News has taken to reporting England’s numbers as their headline which seems crazy. Boris Johnson has been moved out of ICU and is on the road to recovery which is great news for the country. You have to think that maintaining the NHS will be at the forefront of our politics now after everything they have done during this crisis? Their staff all deserve a huge pay rise. There are so many key workers that are keeping our strange new world spinning.

One things for sure, things will never be the same again after all this. We will never take a handshake for granted… going out for coffee, a wander round the shops…. I wander how much will change moving forward, will we be able to hug each other without fear of passing the virus, will we congregate in huge crowds ever again, life with return to normal I’m sure but it will be another variation on normal I guess. Anyway, I’m shattered so early night… how stiff are we gonna be in the morning?!? Must set myself to “off duty” on the app for what it’s worth… kept it on all night last night.. doh! OH MY GOD ITS RAINING, THE HEAVENS HAVE JUST OPENED…. MY DECKING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😳🤬

Just announced another 750+ deaths today and yet we are still so lucky not to have been touched personally by it so far. Boris Johnson the Prime Minister is apparently recovering now in ICU which is good. He’s not my cup of tea but we need him back and healthy controlling from Westminster.

So, my day… I got up early and headed to B&M Stores for it opening. Managed to get around and out without seeing anyone other than the guy on the till which was great. Hand sanitiser all over my hands then the trolly handle before I went in. Hands washed as soon as I got back and after putting everything away. Would you believe that only gained me 1,045 steps?!? I mean wtf?? So yip dog walk…..

It’s was really smirry misty rain today and everything’s starting to grow now, green shoots against previously burnt undergrowth looks amazing.

Really enjoyed the walk today, listening to music and messaging folk as I went along! All going great until a cyclist was bombing down the hill towards me and I didn’t see him, had to jump out his way and may have wee’d a little bit 🤭😬🤷🏻‍♀️🤣.

A few months back I had crocheted some baby blankets to take up to Paisley Maternity for their Neo natal unit.

I never got to drop them off as there was flooding the first tome I went and the road was closed and then the virus hit. Next door Claire’s friends sister had a baby recently and he was only 1lb 1oz. She asked on FB for someone to crochet a blanket for his cot and Claire asked if I still had any. Am going to give her them all and she’ll drop them at her friends house and she sent me a very special photo of wee teeny Cooper saying he says thank you. 💙 it melted my heart. So glad I can actually get them to people who need them.

Spent the rest of the day planting seeds for our newly finished greenhouse. It’s the first time we’ve had no gaps in the glazing since we moved in. So chuffed with it. How old are you getting when you love your greenhouse. So joined mum and dad in planting Sweet Pea seeds, potatoes, onions and basil!

Started work on the fruit beds which were a disaster. Trimmed loads back and tried to direct them to grow up the fence.

Our fascination with virus films is ongoing… 28 days later first followed by 28 weeks later… not sure I’ll sleep tonight! We did the clap for NHS tonight and our neighbour played the pipes! It won’t let me post the video here but will find out how thats done and edit it in if I can!! Oops better switch myself to “off duty” with the GoodSam app…… night all x

So it’s a lovely day today…. still cold in the breeze but nice enough to be outside if you can get out of it. So the 15k steps are still talking to me…..all the time. Awake at 6.30am and set the GoodSam app to on duty. Waiting…

We both took the dogs out this morning, didn’t get anywhere near the number of steps in…. was slowed by my companions…. 🧔🏽🐶🐶🐶 truth isn’t I’m just not feeling it today, I’m still tired. When we got back and after the obligatory coffee, Craig had some work to do so I decided to tackle the spare room… it’s been my dumping ground for all the things I want to sell on eBay over the last few months. I am actually going to post a photo of how bad it is. This blog is gonna be nothing if not honest!

I’m trying to sort into piles for charity, piles for selling on eBay, piles for the camping shed (which is still a work in progress!) piles that we might want to keep and as usually happens.. a whole pile that I have no idea what to do with. Being off sick for so long showed me how much junk we had collected over the years. As I learned how much connection and love mattered, I realised that possessions are nothing. My sudden increase by 2 or 3 dress sizes didn’t help either! I now have bags of size 10, 12, 14 just lying around in the hope the bloody stepping makes a difference. My wardrobe is full of 16/18/20and even a 24!!!!!!!!! So I know the steps need done but I really need to put my feet up and write this… see what I did there??!? Feet are now up, excuses made. The room upstairs is nowhere near finished!

Maybe a bit more background as to how I’ve found myself with so much time on my hands, Covid-19 not withstanding. (Now that some people might actually be reading this….. 😱) I’ve had a career in manufacturing since I finished Uni in 1995. It’s all I’ve ever known. I became pretty career driven in those early days always wanting to be senior management to hear what was going on behind those closed doors. I was lucky that my salary grew every year though sadly in the female way where I was still earning a lot less than my male colleagues. At the start that never bothered me as I wanted the recognition for my efforts. Ooooh and effort I gave… in barrow loads… shed loads… bus loads…. I am a people pleaser. I want everyone round about me to be happy, I want everyone to like me and I want everyone to see how dedicated I am. I want no one to fault me, no one to be able to pick holes in my efforts or my convictions. So…. I’m customer facing and I like to keep the customers happy, the factories happy, my team happy…. the whole world happy…are you bored yet? Can you see how impossible that was? Over the years I battled on, those who worked with me will have been aware of my rising stress levels but this kind of behaviour is impossible to keep up. Imagine then coming home and trying to make sure the house was ship shape, the dogs were walked, fed and so it goes on. Never any time or concern for me in there. Then the tears become unbearable. I’d cry at everything and then cry at my crying and keep crying. I had failed everyone, I was worthless and I thought everyone would be better off if I wasn’t here. Looking back on those darker days I can’t believe I could logically think that but I wanted to feel better, wanted to get back to work, wanted to be normal. I relied heavily on my amazing support network of family and friends and even virtual friends I met through Dry January. They were a constant source of support and praise. That’s all I needed. Just someone to listen and not judge me, to hug me (as that was allowed in those days!!) and to tell me everything was ok. It was ok not to be ok.

So after a year and a half of dark days, self loathing, fear and more tears than you would ever think possible I am finally coming out the other side. Coronavirus is horrific but we are blessed not to be that touched by it yet. Sadly yesterday 786 people in the UK died from it, we still don’t know of anyone yet. We expect the worst is yet to come and lockdown will continue for a good bit yet. While many suffer with their health, their lack of wealth at this time, I am strangely relaxed and content with this new way of life. Everyone has joined my new crazy life of being at home all the time! Now I cannot go out there is no excuse for staying home. It suits me just fine for now. No pressure to do anything. Just waiting for the GoodSam alert to go off!!

Have never attempted any other stitch than the granny square crochet so thought I’d finally try. Going to make myself a hat. It’s already too big for my head but that’s ok…. practise makes perfect. Just had a lovely across-fence-socially-distanced-up-ladder coffee with Claire from next door. So nice to chat!!

We watched the film Pandemic tonight… a wee bit close for comfort, just heard the death toll for past 24 hours in the UK is 854, it’s getting higher almost every day. The film starts with flu like symptoms too… 😢 crazy watching known that we have Covid-19 for real….. 🤯 let’s see what tomorrow brings.

First thing I read today is that the GoodSam app goes live today! I’m not “worked” since the end of summer 2019 due to my depression but it felt right to volunteer to support the NHS during this COVID-19 pandemic. Jumped out of bed, showered hair washed and walked dogs in the glorious sunshine and the Alert never went off once all day!!

So I spent the day a bit like a frustrated coiled spring but ended up helping Craig renovate the back of the Jeep ready for action whenever we can get away again. If he ever reads this I think he’ll have something to say about the amount of help I gave him….. just putting that out there but I was very supportive…. so a few pics of the work in progress and completion!

So the sun shone all day though it was bloody cold in the wind at times. Craig had me breaking up pallets with a mallet and an axe 😱 only managed one and felt vibration white finger kicking in so gave up (ok I can be a bit dramatic but hey… it was bloody hard work!) we need the stripped pallets for the inside of the shed.

We sat out for a bit with a beer and and AF (alcohol free) beer and went in for a later dinner and another movie!!

Thy is is our second Sunday in lockdown and the forecast suggests it’s gonna be a warm ish day.. 14 deg!! (At time of writing can confirm it has been pretty cool and cloudy but I’m still sitting outside on a dog bed writing this!)

So I’m no doubt boring you but first things first… steps. I plant to get them out the way before hubby surfaces with his inevitable hangover. It’s a lovely morning. Some pics..

I crawl back home to find hubby still “recuperating” in bed. Get my shower and I’m determined I’m not moving for the rest of the day!! I manage to have “lockdown coffee” with my neighbour next door on ladders over our 6ft dividing fence. Making sure we are 2 m apart and we bring our own cuppa!!!

I’m crocheting a blanket for hubby just now. I made myself one while I was off sick as crochet became my way of relaxing and calming my mind. And he can’t see green cheese! He wants one. I’ve done 6 squares so far and only another 42 to go!!!!!! When he told me how many I had to go I decided it could be a Christmas present. If I manage it before then it’s a bonus!!